Anxiety in High-Achieving Adults

What others might not know, and what you would never share…

… is that beneath the surface of a seemingly “together” exterior, you’re fighting a constant churn of anxiety.

Nobody would ever believe something was wrong because you’ve always portrayed yourself as being “fine” – even though, on the inside, you feel you’re falling apart.

In the beginning, it may have been nervous energy – a fear of failure or of disappointing others that drove you to make moves, achieve, and be successful. And, in the beginning, it might have felt good because it pushed you to achieve and brought you praise and acknowledgment from others.

But, after a certain point, the returns diminish.

Tell me if you ever find yourself…

Feeling overwhelmed because it’s too hard to say “no” to others?
Overthinking everything?
Getting upset when your routine gets disrupted?
Waking up in the middle of the night or having trouble falling asleep because of racing thoughts?
Biting your nails or clenching your jaw while you’re working?
Fighting a churning feeling in your stomach on “big days”?
Racing thoughts that make it difficult to relax or focus?
Using alcohol and substances to cope with your stress?
Feeling like a failure or that you’re not doing enough… even though you might be working long hours and burning yourself out?

You can only go on like this for so long.

The thoughts begin to interfere with your sleep, relationships, and ability to care for yourself.

You’re running on fumes. Even though your schedule is jam-packed, you don’t feel like you can say “no” – and you take on even more.

You desperately need a day off from work to get yourself together, but you’re too afraid to call in sick or take a vacation day because you don’t want to let others down.

Lauren* was on the fast track.

Completing a double major in college, she always had high expectations for everything she did.

After college, she got a job in New York working in sales. A high performer at her job, always the first to arrive and the last to leave, Lauren made some big sales and got attention from higher-ups who had expressed that she had a bright future.

But her drive to keep improving and moving fast was causing her to hate working with others. She started feeling envious and threatened when others would receive praise. She started feeling that being recognized as having potential was actually a curse.

She felt riddled with anxiety, nerves, and self-doubt.

Lauren came to me after a blow-up with a coworker. She could barely remember how the event started, but she felt embarrassed about how her emotions overwhelmed her, and she knew something needed to change.

My work with Lauren started with learning to name and recognize her emotions as they were occurring, so she did not simply feel “overwhelmed” all the time. By labeling her emotions, we were able to disentangle her stressors, triggers, and feelings so that she could have mental clarity. We also worked on new coping and mindfulness skills to calm her in big meetings and recharge from her long workdays. In time, she decided to set limits and boundaries with work and found this helped her feel more at ease and work more efficiently. We also worked at defining her values to help her feel confident that her choices led her toward a life that would align with her truths.

After a few months of working together, Lauren started to feel less anxious and happier. She was able to try her best without failure at the front of her mind, take pride in the work she did, celebrate others’ success, and enjoy her leisure time.

We now meet monthly for check-ins.

You don’t need to be “secretly anxious” to achieve and succeed.

I know that might seem counterintuitive to you. In fact, you probably have some anxiety about “letting go” of what you feel is a core part of your personality.

I’m here to tell you that you can hold on to your positive qualities and many of the habits you’ve developed… but let go of the tension and internal struggle. You may be pleasantly surprised to learn constant struggle isn’t required for you to succeed.

Together, we will give you the perspective and skills needed to stop overthinking and start living the life you want. Our work will help you learn new ways of thinking and communicating with others to set boundaries, communicate your needs, and set realistic expectations for yourself and others. You will learn new skills to manage your anxiety, improve your sleep and self-confidence. With my help, you will learn how to direct your energy and attention to areas of your life where you have control and learn to accept what you cannot.

Together, we will help you work smarter, not harder.

If you, too, are done with the constant mind chatter, racing thoughts, and deprecating self-talk, do yourself a solid and schedule an initial consultation to talk about how we can make that happen.

Call (845) 418-3239 or email me at [email protected], and I will get you set up with a free 15-minute consultation phone call.

*Name changed to protect client confidentiality.